Gender and sexual minorities are misrepresented in media world-wide, Japan being no exception. Two books that discuss onee-kotoba can be read online here and here, and a simple search of this word in either English or Japanese will also bring up many informative results. Onee-kotoba, literally “older sister speech” is the exaggerated, effeminate speech used by Japanese drag performers. Grell’s use of female pronouns and titles could be attributed to おネエ言葉. The question mark following “human” is most likely there because Grell is technically not human, but a Reaper.) (Note: okama is translated to transsexual in the link. A translation can be found here, but this specific word is used in this context: それにねえ オカマにだって人（?）権, saying “even okama have human (?) rights”. Grell himself uses the word okama in reference to himself in artwork (the image is about 2/3 of the way down the page) posted to Yana’s blog. Other Kuroshitsuji characters, written by Yana Toboso, also refer to Grell with male pronouns.This word, okama, is generally used to refer to a (usually quite flamboyant) gay man or male cross-dresser. The author of Kuroshitsuji and the Kuroshitsuji Character Guide, Yana Toboso, refers to Grell with neutral or male pronouns ( 彼) and as オカマ here and here respectively, to give only two examples. Ignoring the above points is a disrespect to the character and the transgender community.She also states that her biggest complaint is that she was not born a woman and the thing she wants most is a sex change.In the above-mentioned interview, Grell expresses feeling depressed when she was not able to present herself as female.
Grell and Madame Red’s bond began out of empathy for her inability to bear children ( source this is also mentioned in both the anime and manga). Grell refers to herself with female pronouns and titles, such as actress, maiden, and lady, in all canons and the oft-cited interview in the Kuroshitsuji Character Guide (both Japanese and English versions of relevant pages can be found in this post). In Support of the Use of Female Pronouns: Please also note that my pronoun use for Grell changes in accordance to what point is being made. Both sets have five bulleted points each. Before you read, I want to point out that, while there is very obviously more text under the “Male Pronouns” heading, this is because I wanted to be very thorough in citing my sources because it was not as simple as pulling examples from the character interview.
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